After spending far too much time doom-scrolling through social media lately, I’ve come to a conclusion: some of y’all really shouldn’t be reproducing anymore. I don’t say this lightly—it’s just that after seeing how you parent in public posts, comments, and TikToks, I think it might be time to hang up the diaper bag.
Lucky for you, the universe has a sense of humor. Planned Parenthood is actually stepping up to celebrate World Vasectomy Day by offering free vasectomies to underinsured or uninsured men in Kansas City on October 20th. Yes, free. No co-pay, no deductible, no “Oops, looks like another one slipped through.” Just a quick snip, and you can stop passing down your Facebook password and Mountain Dew Code Red diet plan to the next generation.
So, if you’re a man who’s been flirting with the idea of permanent birth control—or if you’re the partner of one and you’ve been praying nightly for divine intervention—here’s your sign. Call 816-756-2277 for info.
Because let’s be honest: the world doesn’t need another live-streamed toddler meltdown at Applebee’s, another 12-year-old selling “edibles” out of their lunchbox, or another TikTok dad teaching his kid how to vape while riding an electric scooter through Walmart.
Happy World Vasectomy Day, Kansas City. May your future family trees be pruned to perfection.
—Mack
