My neighbor has a habit of borrowing things and forgetting to return them. It started with small stuff—sugar, a screwdriver—but now it’s bigger things like my lawnmower. I don’t want to ruin our friendly relationship, but I also don’t want to keep losing my belongings. How do I handle this without being the neighborhood grump?
Sincerely, Tired of Being the Community Lending Library
Dear Tired Librarian,
Ah, the age-old question: how do you get your stuff back without looking like the bad guy? The answer, my friend, is simple—be just as forgetful as your neighbor. Next time they come over, act real friendly, and say, “Hey, I meant to grab that lawnmower back from you before I need it this weekend.” If they look surprised, remind them: “You know, the one you borrowed a while back. No rush, just whenever you get a chance!” Then stand there. Smile. Wait.
If that doesn’t work, escalate with strategy. Start casually borrowing from them—hedge trimmers, a ladder, maybe even their car (kidding, mostly). When they ask for their stuff back, hit ‘em with a lighthearted, “Oh, like my lawnmower?” The goal isn’t revenge, just a little good-natured accountability.
And if they still don’t get the hint, it might be time for an honest talk. Tell them you’re happy to share, but you need your things returned in a timely manner. If they take offense, that’s on them—not on you. Borrowing isn’t the problem here, forgetting is.
If all else fails, invest in a label maker and start slapping your name on everything like you’re running a summer camp. Nothing makes a borrower more sheepish than realizing they’ve been hoarding half of your garage with your name on it.
Good luck, Mack
