Dear Mama Jay,
My husband and I are retired so we spend a lot of time together. I don’t like negativity and confrontation. It doesn’t bother my husband at all. Every day he is complaining about someone or something he read on the Internet that he doesn’t like. Do you have any ideas how I can nicely let him know I don’t want to hear about his opinions?
Dear Too Much Negativity
I can’t imagine what your days must feel like. Do you know what is causing this constant need to talk about negative issues? Too much internet and TV on certain channels can certainly cause this to happen. I have several friends who say their husbands spend the entire day listening to TV. My friends say it is awful.
How to live with this day and day out, that is the question. My husband and I are polar opposites politically. There was a time that it could have caused a divorce. We no longer talk politics, period. He has friends he can talk to about what is happening.
I see you don’t like confrontations. I understand that. I get knots in my stomach when I feel the need to bring up something.
I did read some articles about this and they had similar answers. Think about how this continuous complaining makes you feel every day. Discuss with him how hard it is each day for you to listen to him. It’s one of those conversations you begin with “I feel ……. Have some suggestions of how to break up the day to get his mind off it. Is there an activity that you can do together? Play cards, go out to lunch, watch a movie, work in the garden? The article did say to build up positive emotions and also tell him you love him but you need to have less negativity in the home. I hope some of these tips work. Don’t be afraid to talk to him about it. It’s not healthy for you. You can do this!!
Love Mama J
